"Wake Up Call"

In honor of Listen To Your Mother, I am writing about my own experience and wishing all the women who are reading tonight at the, River View Theatre a big giant GOOD LUCK and CONGRATULATIONS! Pictured below is the cast of talented writers (right before we took the stage.) I have never been more honored than I was that night...It was everything you'd expect about motherhood-the good, the bad, the ugly and the beautiful all wrapped up in the voices of these amazing women. You can listen to all of their stories on YouTube by searching, Listen To Your Mother 2016.

My piece is called, "Wake Up Call," (click here to watch) and it's the story of my son calling from school after the drug dog had found pot in his car. Lovely! I know. But the story is true. It happened. To me (little ol' me!) And my son and I are forever changed by the choices and decisions that followed that life changing moment.

Making the cast of LTYM was a moment I will never forget. I have a copy of the email, "CONGRATULATIONS, You Are Part Of The 2016 CAST" sitting beside my writing desk. To say I was overwhelmed is an understatement. I cried tears of joy at the powerful acknoweldgemt and still get goosebumps when I think about being on that stage and sharing my essay. The acknowledgement from the amazing producers, Vikki Reich and Galit Breen gave me the courage to powerfully say, I AM A WRITER and I will forever be grateful for their encouragement and devotion to truth.

Over 700 souls witnessed our stories that night and tonight, the stories will be different, but the magic and truth will be the same. Every heart present will be touched, reminded and moved by each powerful presentation.

If you are free tonight, you can see if tickets are available. If not, please take the time to listen to the stories later on YouTube. You won't regret it.

Miles watching his Mama on stage...One of my favorite images of the night!

Keeping Myrtle alive!

Can I keep my new Myrtle topiaries alive? That's the big question I'm grappling with at the moment, because in all honesty, I've never been able to in the past (insert sad face here.) I either watered too much or didn't water enough. Myrtle topiaries are a delicate, but hearty plant and regardless of how hard it is for me to keep them alive, I find them to be stunning in any room and I am committed and trying (so hard) to keep them happy!When my kids were younger and I had a babysitter, I'd go over a list of do's and don'ts and then ultimately end up with, "just keep them alive until I get back." The sitter would laugh, but really— I wasn't kidding. I kind of feel like that now, because every morning when I wake up, I rush to see how they're doing.

Yesterday, one looked a little under the weather and I panicked! I put it in the sink and watered it (maybe I said a little a prayer or two) and then let it drain into a cup, (to make sure it didn't sit in any water) and people...It worked! Today she is bright and bushy and all smiles. Phew!!!

A few of my readers have said only water once a week and let drain in the sink. They also like a nice sunny window! Okay, I can do this!

Why all of a sudden this obsession with Myrtles? Well, I started following myrtle enthusiast, designer Loi Thai. He and his partner Tom Troeschel have grown myrtles (Myrtus communis 'Compacta') in their Washington, D.C., home for more than 10 years. (If I have these for 10 years it will be a full on miracle!) By the way, his instagram is gorgeous! Follow him @loithai

Loi says, "Water consistently, the extra moisture is why my pots get nice and mossy. Good drainage is important; soil should be damp but not stay wet. Myrtles respond well to pruning. Foliage production slows in winter, so most training and shaping occur when plants are actively growing—in spring and summer."

Lucky for me, summer is near and myrtle plants tend to thrive in the summer months. Loi mentioned "shaping" his myrtles when there is new growth, so clipping your topiary often during it’s high growing season (summer,) will keep the growth looking full and beautiful (looks like I'll need a trip to the plant store for some trimming shears.)

The good news is my little darlings are thriving and this Mama is happy! Maybe one day they'll be as big and beautiful as Loi's pictured below. 

View fullsize

Follow @sweetshadylane for design inspiration and love!

XO ~Heather

Go Ahead...Get Dirty!

People often say that my home is "comfortable." Someone once even said that it was "emotional," and I knew right away why. My designs are personal (and I find great joy in making them so) which is why I decided to write a post on my own tried and true tips for buying special objects, so that your home can be an intimate reflection of you and your family.IF IT SPEAKS TO YOU...LISTEN!

I've been there, you know, standing in the dusty antique shop searching for something to shout out, "HEY! OVER HERE!" To find the little glass corgi puppy hidden behind the ugly lamp with a three-tiered yellow, ruffled shade. Point is, DON'T GIVE UP! Antique stores require you to be at attention and ready to work. The treasures sometimes find you, but sometimes you have to work to find the treasures. So eat a healthy breakfast, drink your coffee and get ready to work. You won't believe what sweet gems you can find in these little dusty havens.

Disclaimer, not all antique stores are dusty, but some of the best ones are! I love the Buffalo Nickel (great for kids rooms, Red Wing pottery, antique silver, cabin decor,)  Loft Antiques (a good variety of all kinds of styles, I've bought some great shell art here,) H & B Gallery (divine antique furniture, dishes, art, rugs,) The Country Look in Antiques (I have purchased a few of their beautiful antique sail boats-they do not have a website and prefer cash) and well curated (no dust) shops that carry great antiques like, Victory (seriously, one of my favorites) and The Golden Rule (just took home a family of brass ducklings...I know, who knew!)

TRUST YOUR GUT!

I know the feeling of finding something really cool and then wondering where in the heck am I going to put this? But if it really is special...GET IT! You'll work out the details later and you'll be thrilled that you did. One of my "trust your gut" moments like that was the time I found two wicker cubes at a garage sale. At the time, I had no place for them, but I'm no dummy, I knew they were special. So I paid the nice lady thirty dollars and hauled off my, I have no place to put these cubes in the back of my truck. For two years they sat in the basement gathering dust (again the dust) until I had a brilliant idea!! I had cushions made and monogrammed them-another great way to personalize something and make a design statement. Now they are a focal point in my bedroom sitting area. 

EMBRACE WHAT YOU LOVE!

I don't know why or how or when, but somewhere along the way, I fell madly in love with clipper ships, sail boats, sea shells and all things nautical in nature. I assume it's because we bought a home on the water or my major love for Nantucket, but truly this love has always been with me, and because this post is about personalizing your home, I have to show you some of my favorite nooks and crannies of Mona Bina (Home For All.) Bring on the clipper ships...Okay if you insist!

DISPLAY YOUR TREASURES!

Your kids made you a special card that you cherish? FRAME IT in a pretty frame and set it by your desk or by your bedside table. Frame those special pieces of art (not all of it though...You have to trust what is worth hanging in your home...I mean your kids are talented and all, but too much would be well, just that...Too much! I framed my son's first pair of glasses and it makes me smile every time I look at them. They are scratched and bent and totally worn and I adore them. Remember here, that trusting your gut is important...You want to display what is meaningful to you. 

Also, when traveling, find the antique stores! Some of my favorite purchases are from out of town stores. Keep an eye out for antique markets and special venues like the, "Junk Bonanza," that comes twice a year to Minneapolis. I buy my ticket in advance and me and one of my besties, plan for a dusty adventure. Markets like this can be overwhelming, but once you settle into it, the treasures will start to emerge and make sense. They also serve fair type food, which pairs well with this kind of shopping...A win for all. Who knows, one unique find might lead to an idea and spark the whole design or theme of a room. Keep an open mind and by all means...Beat your friend to the good stuff! Just kidding Ellie!!

A home is a love story, filled with images and memories that carry the heart of stranger through the inner workings of a family. To keep the memories of raising your family in your heart is one thing and to display them in your home is another. It's truly a gift to your guests and to your family to feel the warmth of a well curated home. I believe that every room should tell a story, which is why I love stories and decorating-go figure! 

So go ahead...GET DIRTY! Scour those dusty antique stores, roll up your sleeves at a junk bonanza in your area, hit a garage sale, an estate sale or better yet, see what is collecting dust in your parents basement, your grandparents basement or heck, even your own basement. 

I promise you won't regret it!

XO

P.S Are we friends on Instagram? Let's make that happen. Follow @sweetshadylane for daily doses of home decor love.

Goodbye Screen Door

I loved renovating our home, but...It is A LOT of work. Like giving birth to an elephant kind of work. There are many decisions that need to be made (sometimes quickly) and although I did my best to get it all just the way I wanted, I realized after two years of decisions, our last one being the style for the office, I was tired.As I mentioned in my last post, "Go Ahead, Write Your Story," I'm writing a book, sometimes that's hard for me to say, but I am. I'm writing a book. I needed a creative space to well, you know, write! The office sits right off our family room, which is the only stained wood (non-white) room in the whole house. It's cozy and warm and a nice departure from the all white, which I love, so when it came down to final decisions on the color for the office, my tired self said, make it like the family room, that way everything will flow together. Which it does, beautifully, but something about the stained wood office left me uninspired and leary of writing in a cold, dark space.

The office was originally part of the old living room and off that living room, there was a door that led to a screened in porch. Since we hadn't lived in the house yet, keeping the door to the porch was a no brainer. However, a few months of living in Mona Bina, (Home For All) I realized that I was never going to use that porch and something needed to be done about the dark office.

I started in gently. "Hey honey! You know that office is so cold with that porch door. Maybe if we closed it off, we could save some money on our heating bill." Genius, I know. Get him on his level of thinking and go from there. "I mean, we never use that porch. At this point, it's only storage." A few weeks later. "Hey babe, you know it's so dark in the office?" No response, but that didn't stop me. "I'd love to write in there, you know...Have my own spot, but it would have to be painted white." Crickets. Call him at work. "Hi gorgeous! You know, I really want to spend a good amount of time writing (TRUE) and I believe that closing myself up in the office is my best bet, you know getting away from the dogs, dishes, laundry, etc. I think I'm going to call Landschute and see if they can come over for a consult, I have a lot of ideas." Wait for it... "Sounds good sweetie. I can't wait to see what you do!" Mic drop. Actually phone drop. He's AMAZING!

Waisting no time at all, I called, Jon Monson, my amazing architect-always eager and excited for a challenge. I didn't want to change everything, actually I did, but Jon in his patience-heard me out and then offered some great suggestions on how we could avoid spending a ton of money. Thank you Jon! We came up with a plan to close off the porch, put doors on some of the shelves and paint that sucker white!

Truth corner...Did I really need a new office to finish my book? LOL! NO! My writing group lovingly heard my plea for my creative ideas and giggled while encouraging me and reminding me that creativity happens when we powerfully choose to be just that...creative! That can happen at your kitchen table, propped up on a pillow in your comfy bed, or sitting at your favorite coffee shop. 

For me, creativity happens in spaces I create. I can't even express how much I love this room, not just for it's aesthetic, but for the possibility it holds as I pursue my passions. I sit on my little tuffet (which is where I am currently perched) and I write blogs, short stories and pour my heart into my novel. 

XO

"Write Your Story...I've Got Your Back." -God

Twenty plus years ago, I sat at my computer in a little office I created. I wanted it to be perfect. I bought an antique pine desk and nestled it in the dormer of our bedroom. I found a pretty glass lamp and used an extra dining chair that held me comfortably, as I sat cross legged with a blanket across my thighs. In that chair, at that desk, I wrote a sentence that changed my life. One sentence. 

                    my pretty pine desk

After I wrote it, I sat back, surprised. Very surprised. I remember the pause as I sat in my chair. Even now, I see my shocked younger self, hands pulling away from the keys, the rise and fall of my chest as I inhaled the gift. And with that very breath, I came to know my true self. 

Where did that come from? I read the sentence over and over in a southern drawl and allowed the character that was alive inside me, the freedom to finally be. The joy was overwhelming. I looked out the window of our first home, grinning in gratitude. I found the gift God gave me in that instant of breath and God and I, well, we were having a moment. The joy we both felt was palpable and fiercely alive. 

My baby girl was napping in her nursery below me, my husband was off at work and in that stillness, at that desk, I was in the presence of God. And a  treasure of pure joy literally moved through my fingertips.

How long had I ignored my characters knock at the door? How often had God whispered, write and I, full of fear, had quickly pushed it away. The rush of adrenaline from ignoring the fear and freeing the gift, surged through me. I was awake. Finally. Aware that God finds His joy in us finding ours. I continued to write. 

We had another child, a boy. Our home grew small and we moved. My desk thoughtfully placed in a new home, a new space. The children kept me busy. I wrote here and there. My story grew and so did our family, we had two more babies and moved again. My precious time with God and my story took a back seat to raising my family; my desk, now a console table in our living room. 

When the gifts weren't used, fear crept in. Every time I'd look at my desk, I'd hear my inner critic's negative bullying. Hah, look at you, thinking you really had something there, and you’ll never finish it, so why even start? Or Who would want to read this anyway? You're wasting your time. There is an emptiness that comes with believing the lies of the critic and not pursuing your gifts. No one else knows something is missing, because it's just below the surface of everyday life, but your heart aches for more. It has too. 

About two years ago, I redesigned my life. I decided to stop the ache and kill the critic. I created the possibility of living POWERFULLY and CREATIVELY, and the moment I did...God and I, well...We REJOICED!

I pulled out my computer, prayed and got to work. The characters were right there, like they'd always been-waiting for me to believe in the gift again. I feel closest to God in these moments, which is why I write. A LOT! And here's the cool thing, I don't really care if anyone ever reads it or if anyone thinks it's even good, because I'm at peace pursuing the things that make me happy, that please God and that make me come alive in Him. Phillipains 1:6 reads, "HE WHO HAS BEGUN A GOOD WORK IN YOU WILL COMPLETE IT." And honestly, that is the only encouragement I need. 

Committing to living powerfully and creatively looks like this: I went on a writing retreat, I joined a weekly writing group (that I love,) I started a blog, where I am free to create, whether it's an inspiring room or a story like this one. I tried out for Listen To Your Mother with a piece I wrote about my son and was picked to be a part of the cast, I created an instagram account (@sweetshadylane) that is a feed full of rooms, vignettes and designs that inspire. Along with my novel, I dream of producing a coffee table book on decor and with God rejoicing in all my creative endeavors, I plan to finish my novel, one sentence at a time.

My pursuits have to be fearless, so everyday, with God by my side, I fight the critic. I have to. Because living out God's possibility for me is worth fighting for. I stopped worrying what others may think, do or say. No, I don't have a degree in design or even writing for that matter, and that's just the thing...Becoming your true self, means letting go of the things that get in the way. Trust me, my critic has previously mentioned those things and one of us already won that fight. 

Coco Chanel said, “beauty begins the moment you decide to be yourself.” And isn’t that so true? That instant of time, at that pretty pine desk, was my moment.